To know where you are going, you have to know where you have been. Here I am listing my starting point, my progress, and the goals I am working towards. Ultimately, I want to create habits that will allow me to accomplish my goals with little resistance– that would be nice, huh?
Goal #1: Get My Weight Under Control – A.K.A The Trophy Wife
Being healthy is vital to my personal happiness, my ability to take care of my family, and be a positive contributor to my community. Side effect of being healthy? Your spouse thinks you’re a smokin’ babe. My BF tells me that he loves me for me. That’s nice. What he doesn’t say is how my weight has impacted our romantic interactions. No matter what anyone says, sex is very important in a relationship (especially a 15 year long one). Though I have always been heavy, I have never let it stop me from enjoying sex. And now it is getting in the way – no pun intended. Since I met my BF (in 2001) I’ve gained 70 pounds. All of that in the last 2 years. More honesty? Okay. Forty five of that in the last year. I’m not talking about the fluctuating baby weight you get when you’re pregnant. This is “I don’t want to get out of bed so I will hide in the fridge” weight that depression kicks your ass with. It’s as delightful as it sounds.
06/24/16 – 264# and I’m 5’8″
Though my ultimate goal is to weigh 150, my focus right now is the 70 I plugged on. After I reach that goal, I’ll re-evaluate so I can work my way down to 150.
Goal #2: Cook every night food that my family will actually eat.
Go on and laugh but I don’t cook. Not a little. Not grilled cheese sandwiches. I bet you wonder what my kids eat… there’s a lot of dino shaped chicken nuggets, those ready made chickens from Smart and Final, not to mention McDonald’s should be sending me thank you cards for all the money I dump in there every day. My BF informed me that we need to stay focused on our budget and that McDonald’s isn’t going to be in that budget. I know all the mom judge-ers are going to have lots to say about that but fact of the matter is: I got 3 kids. All are out for Summer Vacation and if I don’t get 20 minutes to myself (be it in a McDonald’s Play Land) then I am going to go postal. When they build an environmentally friendly, organic, peanut and gluten free fast food place that has food kids will actually eat and a play yard, I swear I will be first in line.
That is not the case today.
However, I am excited about learning to cook. I can make a full Thanksgiving turkey dinner with all the trimmings and such, but do not ask me to make a grilled cheese sandwich unless you like it burnt. My goal is to cook every night. This week, I ‘cooked’ once.
Goal #3: Live the essence of Mary Poppins
I grew up on the east coast where the parenting skill set came with a belt and the words ‘idiot’ ‘moron’ ‘fatty’ and ‘where’s your brain?!’ Charming, I know. But I’m a part of that generation I suppose. I try to do better with my kids but I can be so short tempered. I forget that my 6 year old isn’t 8 and tend to give them similar roles that (of course) my 6 YO can’t do. I get frustrated. She gets frustrated. It’s just bad for everyone. We are in family counseling and the therapist turned me onto a program called 1-2-3 magic! to help lower the frustrations overall in the household. And let me tell you, man it works.
The idea is that when your kid messes up, they get counted. You say, “One.” If the kid doesn’t correct himself in 5 seconds, you go, “Two.” They get one more 5 second chance and then BOOM! Time out. There are exceptions of course and time out means something different to every kid. Like my 6 YO, her time out is being without her blanket for that time. For my 8 YO, she has to sit in the middle of the bare floor for hers because that girl can’t sit still for nothing. And for the 2 YO (yes, even her), she has to sit in a chair and not get down. Drives her nuts. It was a quick learning curve. They do not want to get counted! But then once the time out is done, the matter is dropped. None of this, “let’s talk it out” bologna. You just move on with your day. Don’t mention it at all. I’m not an expert, I just have 800 kids that seem to respond to this plan so I think it’s wonderful.
Anyway, with that 1-2-3 going, the kids help out around the house more. They seem to listen more and respond in a more constructive way. They listen better in public. With them helping around the house and keeping the stress factor lowered, it’s been making life a little easier at home. It seems to be creating a partnership between the kids. I like it.
When the kids are behaving, then I can be more like Mary Poppins and less like a screaming banshee…
Goal #4: Clean and tidy home
No one wants to live in a dump. Between 3 kids and this depression, I find it hard to get out of bed, let alone clean something. For the last 3 months, I have refined a cleaning schedule that keeps me on track and focused so I don’t have time to slip into the black hole (I’ll post it on here for you). I also set hourly alarms on my Fitbit to help me keep moving and not just sink into the sofa or hide in the fridge.
My goal here is to complete my list on a daily basis as my habit. Once that habit is established, I will add to it with monthly or seasonal tasks etc. Eventually, this thorough cleaning will be just normal for me. Normal for me right now is using the sniff test and a broom to get by…
Wish me luck!